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Meaningful Marriage Love Dare Finale Link Up and grateful for pinterest #30dog

15 November 2013

Well lovelies, we've made it through the 40 days of The Love Dare in the Meaningful Marriage book study! Congratulations! No worries if you are still chugging along, it is important to take this dare one day at a time and commit with your whole heart. We won't be starting a new book until January so you have plenty of time to finish! [keep checking for discussion posts in the Facebook group!]

Whether you are married or just starting to talk to your significant other about the possibility of marriage, I am over the moon for The Love Dare!! I'm thinking of giving every couple on my Christmas gift list a copy! And now, allow me to share with you the awesome perspective that I've gained in the short 40 day study.

It all started with a quiz

The purpose of The Love Dare is to grow and foster the unconditional love that is promised between husbands and wives at the alter. Life often places the practice of unconditional love on the back burner. Life is like a fat guy in a little coat trying to separate your marriage at the seam! 

So I decided to jump in head first and commit. I read one challenge per day and found out something really interesting about myself. I am quite the self-centered person. Not every day was enjoyable or easy. Mostly far from easy. But slowly, I started to see my perspective change. 

  1. Communication. How we communicate, especially from my side, has evolved from a place of understanding. I am more willing to stop and evaluate what he is trying to say instead of quickly shutting him down to hear my side of the story. Honestly, this has been the single most exciting transformation for our marriage these past 40 days. And I feel more confident to share with Mr. Collier how I feel about a situation.
  2. Appreciation. I love hearing "thank you" and "great job" for my actions as I am very extrinsically motivated. I've practiced being more aware of things that he does and acknowledging him for it. For example, we have a system when it comes to the dishes. I wash and start the dishwasher and he puts them away. But sometimes I get busy and Mr. Collier just steps in. No questions asked. I've also noticed than when I focus on the positive things he does for us as a family, I fall deeper into love with him.
  3. Trust. I am a doer. So when someone says they will take over on something, I expect it to happen with the same diligence and priority that I do. In a marriage, that doesn't leave much room for trust. And sometimes I fail to trust Mr. Collier to take care of details out of my own insecurity. It has been a conscious decision to let him take the lead on stuff without my tendency to double check. I am embarrassed to say that I even have the natural inclination to want to double check that he "did it right" but it is something the Love Dare highlighted and that I am actively working on. 
  4. Expectations. How I think it should be and how it actually is are often vastly different. Mismanaged expectations often result in hurt feelings and arguments. I never realized that by letting unconditional love take over my thinking and motivations, expectations sort of dissolve. And I'm sure that the increased productive communication is instrumental in this area of improvement.  
What's in a number?

Well, the assessment that I took before we started the study was an evil-opener [evil in the fact that I felt like the crappies spouse in the world after the results]. But it is amazing how my outlook has shifted in the last 40 days. When you finish, I'd highly recommend taking the assessment again to track your results. 

My goal for the dare was to be transformed to the core of my contribution to our marriage. And I think that I achieved that! 

How did you do? What did you think? Link up your posts below!

Day 15: Today I am grateful for Pinterest. I know it is silly to be grateful for a website like Pinterest but have you ever taken a moment to appreciate how it has literally revolutionized our lives? It allows us to dream. Whether it your secret wedding board, baby board or home-to-be it is all there in one awesome inspiration board!

I get most of my ideas for recipes, quotes and home diy project from Pinterest. Seriously, where would be?



Now it's your turn to tell me how you've been doing this week?! Did you instagram pictures or are you doing daily posts about each specific item? That's alright, just link those up if you'd like instead! I'm intending on inserting my photos when I have a chance. It's fun to get a visual of each item I'm listing as a thankful item :)
1. Follow your hosts Keeping Up With Kelsey & Southern Beauty Guide
2. Follow your co-hosts To Be Mrs. Collier & And That's Beautiful To Me
3. Post the button onto your blog post so others can come link up as well
4. Link up your post below and look around at others blogs!

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